Hi! New Moon Lunar Eclipse went by, and I just returned to Pico after a quick dip into the Mainland.
The Forest says hi:
After a few days of recovery, grounding and refocus, your Wizard Friend (that'd be me) is back and ready to Play. Can you feel the energy?
Akinado suggested that the Spring is all about Chaos. I love Chaos. Chaos is Creativity. So I am playing with Chaos and allowing it to Be. It might sound like fun, and sometimes it is, but it is also extremely vulnerable - I am exposing myself to an internal pattern-breaking process, meaning that all the fears, traumas, blockages, attachments, and various types of stuff that doesn't serve me are clearly visible and present.
Chaos is a mirror revealing my internal gremlins. Hello, Beasties! You are all welcome.
The good news is that it's almost Beltane - the Celtic celebration marking burning of the Winter and beginning the Summer. It is one of the rituals that marked me the most, and this year I feel particularly connected to it.
And there is a LOT I am about to Burn in the sacred fire this time.
(I love how still I am in this photo)
🔥
Meanwhile, following my personal legend acts as a flawless compass.
I am going to the Tall Ship School in October, my personal equivalent of Hogwarts, and that focuses my energy, which is possibly the most important practice for me to cultivate in the next weeks. I am the Wand.
I am also a Fool, which my beloved Tarot deck reminded me of yesterday. Drawing the Fool was a perfect fit - I am on the beginning of a Journey that will shape my life beyond what I have ever known, and I have no clue what I am doing. With humility I embody the Beginners Mind and devote myself to the Path ahead. I know where it is going: The Tower, when everything will be falling apart in flames, so I can be reborn into the World. That is my Rite of Passage, and facing Death, in a spiritual and literal sense, is a part of it. I can already feel its presence, just like I did 6 years ago when I was about to depart from my Spiritual Hometown Edinburgh to embark on a sailing adventure.
I remember sitting in the Meadows on my last day before departure. Sinking into the Fear of Death and Being Ready to Die. Sinking into the Infinite Gratitude for Being Alive. Feeling the blessing of Edinburgh and the people that made this chapter for me. I was still bathing in the Beltane energy, feeling so fucking alive and ready.
A few nights ago I held a ceremony for a dear friend, and as we meandered through the hidden paths of Lisbon we have surfaced Traumas and Fears, and embraced them together from a place of Aliveness. The wisdom coming through my friend reconnected the dots in the most fitting way (as it always tends to be), and I feel it is perhaps why I am writing this letter to you.
On my first visit to the Traditional Dream Factory, during a ceremony, I received a message from the future self of a Sacred Tree. It said: NO FEAR. The message hangs in my Cabin reminding me of that moment every day.
I kept noticing though that for months it kept flipping over. So I kept turning it back, and kept trying to get it to stay in place. It wouldn't.
What my friend shared with me on that special night in Lisbon, is Fear Facing as a Practice. For many years she has chosen to deliberately face the fear whenever it would surface - leading to some critical life decisions, that of course turned out to be the most important ones precisely because they came from a place of following her True North.
The more I tune into it, the more I notice that following what I fear is somehow a better direction rather than following what I love. At the end of the day - I LOVE EVERYTHING, because I am Love, and everything is Love, too. And even if I feel oversaturated with spiritual lingo recently, this simple statement feels deeply True.
On the other side of Love, there is Fear. A very specific kind of Fear - the one that invites you to face your deepest shadows through taking action. The Fear that reveals what’s important. The Fear that paralyses. The Fear that gets you stuck. Funny enough I am afraid of being stuck, and it's possibly one of the greatest motivators to face the Fear itself.
In any case, on my return to Pico Island, I've created a new Card to guide me in the next weeks.
I don't want to be Fearless. Instead, I am saying YES to Fear.
I'll leave it here for now. Thank you for witnessing.
Is there anything you'd like to Burn as you welcome the Summer? The night of Beltane (30 Apr / 1 May) is the ideal space to let go of what is no longer needed. And if you don't feel too ceremonial, that's also fantastic. I'm sending you Blessings of Courage from the magickal island, wishing you plentiful of focus, energy, and fun as you face whatever Shadow you are about to face.
😱💙
With Infinite Love - Your Catalyst Wizard,
Michał
ps. Damn - it's the second Moon in a row that I am not publishing my Moonly video. Is that practice about to slip? Who knows. To be honest I don't feel a lot of energy towards video editing at the moment, and I allow myself to be with it. I still have all the footage, so perhaps I'll feel a sudden burst of inspiration and jump right on it sometime soon and catch up on the missing editions. And even if not - that's also okay.